Wednesday, September 22, 2010

Kindergarten A.K.A. The Year from Hell

Here’s the other part of the story that is happening all while this other crap is going on for FB.  Our school system has a messed up way of assigning students to schools.  It is supposed to create diversity and it used to be based on race but now it’s based on your zip code, which means it’s still based on race because the majority of the white kids live in the East end of town and the majority of the African American kids live in the West end of town.  When FB got his school assignment and they wanted to send him to a school in a neighborhood where people get murdered regularly and with a 4 hour bus ride, including a change in busses at a bus depot, we appealed, were denied, appealed again and were denied again.  Not to mention that I wanted to rip the heads off of everyone of the idiots on our school board and I cried nightly about how we were going to get him into a school that was acceptable.  We finally decided we were going to have to look for other options.

We also had him sent through the full gamut of psychological evaluation about this time.  We knew he was smart and that he was having problems with impulsive behavior so it really wasn't a shock when the results came back.  FB was diagnosed with ADHD and they also showed that his IQ was at genius level.  We were also told that the main issue was that his social skills and left brain thinking was delayed and that was why he acted so immature.  However, his right brain, cognitive skills were advanced.  So the disconnect between the development was our problem.  Again, great!  How do we deal with that? 

This information made the school situation even more of a challenge.  We finally decided to send him to a Catholic school nearby and we thought, maybe this is where we're supposed to send him.  Everything happens for a reason, right?  We explained to the principal and teacher that FB was not your average Kindergarten student and they said, "Oh, we understand, ha ha, it'll be fine."  Not so much.  On FB's first day, they called and said we needed to come get him, that they couldn't control him.  Oh, how my heart broke.  Not this again!  What are we supposed to do?  How can we help him?  He's just a five year old boy.  Surely, he can't be acting that badly!  Who will help us help our boy?  He's really a sweet and loving boy.  I cried and then I got mad, then I cried some more.  Over and over I thought, this is so unfair.  How can one boy be saddled with so much pain and difficulty in his life? 

But, we had to take care of our son.  Husband and I read every book, had countless meetings with his teachers and the principals at the school and tried our best to give him the help he needed to be successful.  All the while, the school principal kept saying, "if this doesn't get better, he will not be successful here."  Every time she said that, I thought, "Lady, if you can cure ADHD, I'm happy to try whatever solution you have."  We kept trying to work through it and were waffling back and forth a thousand times about what we needed to do for him.  You'd think by now we'd be able to see the writing on the wall.  When a school wants him out, we need to move him.

Eventually, we decided to give the public school assignment another shot.  We were again assigned to an unacceptable school and again we appealed the assignment.  After numerous calls to the Director of the School Assignment, we were able to secure a spot at a school near our home.  Now the real work had to begin...

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